The Grief We Don’t Talk about with injury & lifestyle change

This week I had one of my last sessions with my Therapeutic coaching certification colleagues and we’re learning about grief.

AND NOT THE STAGES! Because the stages ARE NOT REAL LIFE.  

Life is not linear or defined by clear stages. Stages are helpful for language to know you’re not alone, but there’s no right way to move through grief, just like there is no right way to move through injury.

This week when talking about grief, the type that struck me more than any was

Disenfranchised Grief -

grief that is NOT acknowledged or validated. This grief lacks social recognition and support. This grief is hidden or dismissed, intensifying the emotional burden on those experiencing it.

I’ve worked in this type of grief for my entire career and I didn’t even know the name.

This GRIEF can be the loss of a sport/team or activity due to injury or illness. Or grief from seeing a healthcare provider without a clear diagnosis.

It’s can be a loss of a way you used to move and identify with being.

It’s the loss of moving and fear of injuring yourself further.

It’s the punch in the gut you feel like when someone says “well at least you can still do _____” and you do your best to feel grateful that “it could be worse”,

but not allowing yourself to acknowledge that your body has changed and you can’t do what you used to, I want to let you know THAT SUCKS!

It’s ok to have all the feelings that go with this! When you start to say things like “I used to be/do ______, but I can’t now because of my bad knees/hips/shoulders”

THIS GRIEF IS ALSO….

👉🏻a promotion that you’re now a boss and you’re no longer a colleague

👉🏻earning more money then your friends and moving away to a home and space of your dreams and having no idea what to do in this lifestyle.

👉🏻 letting go a business/career and moving onto to a new chapter

Grief from moving into living your Happily Ever After 💜

Holding BOTH

1.You know in your head (and your heart) you deserve to live this life and it’s WHAT you’ve been working towards.

AND

2. Know it comes with change in your social circle, community, relationships, lifestyle and being open to being a beginner/learner again.

AND

if you’ve previously lost your exercise/workout social community because of injury AND you go through another life transition.

It can feel like your world is getting smaller - even as you move into the life you’ve always dreamed of.

This transition is known as the

Liminal Space

a heightened sense of uncertainty (and overwhelm) as you transition from where you’ve been to where you are going. This affects all humans on a physical, emotional and spiritual level.

It is like this train is leaving whether you are on it or not.

So buckle up, it’s here and have to move with it.

So if you’re like one of the clients I am serving, in my Own Your SHIfT program, and needing support on how to navigate your happily ever after, I’ve got you my friend 💜

You don’t have to be lost out there all alone. I’m here to shine a light and guide you along this space in your life.